Hey, we have all been to a wedding or twenty. Thus, we have all heard some, ummm, bad speeches. But with a little planning and common sense, nobody at YOUR wedding will hear a bad one. 

Not long ago our friends at a British wedding magazine published a piece about wedding speeches. A really good piece, and we're going to paraphrase three no-nos, right here, for you.

Here we go:

Thanking too many people

Your guests spend lots of time and money going to a wedding. Do they (no!) want to hear you thank everybody and his sister? Better: an emotional and/or funny speech which makes them forget all that time and money and remember instead how cool this occasion is.

Don't get us wrong: you gotta thank all parents and grandparents, best man and woman and (say) special folks who made a special effort to make it. But the officiant, caterer, photog? Nah. In fact, they'd prefer a rocking social media review.

You are so charming! For a while...

Although you have so much to say on this long-awaited, dreamed-of occasion, sorry: please keep it under seven minutes. If you do your homework, you'll have time to make 'em laugh, make 'em cry, make 'em remember stuff. And most of all, you and your spouse will always remember that speech (seven minutes!) for the rest of your days.

I Can't HEEEEAAARR YOU.

You have a great DJ and/or band, right? They know a thing or two about sound and the projection thereof, right? Absolutely. Not every venue has great acoustics, and not all guests are silent when it's speech time. So it's a small thing to ask your paid merry-makers to help you think this aspect through; in fact, they'll be honored that you've asked!